Bangkok is Thailand's capital and, for most of the foreigners in these stories, the first city they set foot in. It's chaotic, sprawling, and full of contrasts: skyscrapers next to night markets, temples next to bars. Many of the relationships documented here begin in that mix, between business trips that ran longer than planned and tourists who came for a few days and ended up sorting out a visa for the long term. It's also, unfortunately, the setting for more than one scam in Thailand, so these pages include both genuine love stories and necessary warnings.
A 50-year-old Australian met Mali in Bangkok, a highly educated woman he spoke to every day for months. When she finally told her mother about the relationship, her mother demanded a $35,000 dowry and $2,000 a month. The story of a breakup nobody considers normal, not even Thai people themselves.
A 25-year-old British English teacher met Nisa in Khon Kaen, a university graduate from Isaan with zero interest in the nightlife scene. Her mum, living in Germany, had other plans for her daughter. This is the story of how he won the family over and decided to stay in Thailand.
After seeing plenty of bar scams in Thailand, a Swedish man was introduced online to a woman from Isaan looking for something serious. Months of daily calls and a visit to her family later, the relationship never quite came together. It wasn't the love story he hoped for, and it wasn't a scam either.
On a group tour of Thailand in 2019, an Irishman met a divorced woman running several small businesses on Koh Samui. Lockdown forced her to move back to Isaan, but they never stopped talking every single day. Years later, he's planning to propose on his next visit.
A 43-year-old Welshman went back to Thailand looking for a quiet holiday around Bangkok and Pattaya. He ended up meeting, almost by accident, a 47-year-old Thai woman with kids in Scotland. Now he's planning to drive up to Edinburgh to see her and maybe move there with her.
In 2009, 30 years old and out of work after the crash, a British plasterer from Nottinghamshire landed in Bangkok on his way to Australia. A 24-year-old waitress, a month of island-hopping and years of cheap flights later, he ended up living in Phuket: first at her travel shop, then running a bar on Bangla Road. Never a work permit.
Before a trip to Bangkok, I met up with a woman from a dating app. She said it was her birthday and took me to her favorite restaurant. The bill came with no breakdown: 6,000 baht. When I asked for an itemized version, she got up and vanished. The real bill, from the kitchen, was less than half that.
Graham, a 51-year-old Scot, first came to Thailand at 32, on holiday after a long breakup. In the bars of Koh Samui he met Dao, the woman he'd later marry. Nineteen years, a Thai wedding, and a house built in Isaan later, he lives surrounded by her family and wouldn't change a thing.
Freshly divorced, I flew to Bangkok with a fake forty-dollar Rolex bought on a New York layover. Between bar nights and a reserved woman who set one strange condition for seeing her again, the trip left me two nights I'll never forget, a lesson in misplaced trust, and no plans to bring the real watch next time.
In 2005, heartbroken and with a student loan installment just paid out, I spent a week in Bangkok trying to drink the pain away. I went back nine more times in my early twenties. On one of those trips, in Koh Samui, I met the woman I now live with in England, and with whom I have two daughters.